Not Golden
What do I name that feeling
It felt like gold pouring over me
The warm rays of the sun on my heart
I was so full of laughter and smiles
Real ones...
It was brief, but it happened
I remember it so vividly
Yet, it hurts so bad to remember
I don't know what to call it
I've never felt love like that before
Never felt so secure before
Why is that when it was all false
It was just all a mask
Why didn't I see behind it
Blinded
In love
Why was the bruises and the words
Less pain then the loss?
Why was those hands around my neck
Looked past...
To get back to that golden feeling
Why did I carry on
And why do I want it back at times?
My body bruised
My heart shatterd
I feel like an addicted
Scrambling for their fix
Trying to piece it all together
What did I do so wrong?
To get a taste of something so beautiful
And watch it turn into something
So fucking painful.
It wasn't supposed to be this way
And yet it is
And I still don't believe it.
