Getting Chased

I Used To Run From The Police When I Was Younger, "Back In The Day Before They Would Shoot You."

I learned how to skedaddle from any joker in a car, that would run after me in hot pursuit after I would throw snowballs at their moving vehicle. While I was hotfooting, I learned how to navigate the alleyways and weave through traffic, that involved a combination of car and foot rundowns from these pursuers. How these chases started, is when I used to throw snowballs at cars in the middle of houses on Eureka Ave.-- between, 12th & 13th street. I had the perfect escape routes: MY ALLEY!-- ''there I would hide under any of the nearby neighbor's houses.'' And I was faster than the wind--my legs and feet moving so fast, it's like they formed a wheel-like blur .Nobody got close enough to catch me, to start any 'fights of revenge.'. ,

Sometimes other crazy ass kids in my neighborhood, who I would pal around with, would participate: Most of them were all filled with adrenaline. Police also would hound us at times, for no reasons at all, just because-- they thought we were punks. When they did, we frustrated their efforts--we would take off and bolt to the nearest alley and dive over fences. "They had no idea of how adept we were at getting over those fences. It was so artistically done, like an Allegro movement with great dance leaps and lively bounds. I mean full speed ahead, never break stride, leap high into the fence, and allow the momentum of your feet to swing you over the top, drop down on the other side, all in one motion. And laugh at them, YEAH!!... because they couldn't execute a feat of great artistry as that." It requires learning how to run from pursuits, and some appeared more serious than others. Regardless of the meaning, these chases improved our skill and speed at getting away.

Most cops in my town back then, were too fat and out of shape-- and just gave up, and didn't care too much, unless they were thinking they were commandos. We ran from those yo-yos numerous times, nascent their pursuits. I must say-- we have never gotten caught. We were masters of the 'chase.' The trick is to get out of sight, exit like --'superman,' and have the layout well planned.

"Now, back in the day before they would SHOOT YOU. If they caught you, expect to get a face full of ground, maybe a broken arm, and a big irritated ponderous, porcine, potbellied cop on your back.''

The cops were still pursuing me, even when I got older. I remember way back-- when I was a 20- something, the age of in-betweens -- in between adolescence and adulthood, in between relationships, in between this job and that career -- and it's nearly impossible to know who you are, when you are still an 'UPSTART REBEL.' One night-- I was at a wild ass party in town, everybody was fighting; I got drunk as hell. It's about 12 midnight-- I go outside for some fresh air. As I do so, I see the town's most notorious cop rolling up. GUESS WHO??... I run back into the house and head out the back door.

There's already two cops at the back of the house, they tell me to stop and identify yourself! I yell out, ''I'M THE ROADRUNNER.'' So me, and a few other DRUNKS that were with me-- just book it. While running, I felt like it was the fastest, I'd ever ran. Plus, I felt like crap and was still super drunk, even though-- I threw up, while I was mad dashing it. I ran through some yards with the one cop coming after me, predominantly. I could tell I was making tracks on him though, because, he kept yelling 'stop,' and it was sounding a little further away and I couldn't hear his footsteps anymore. Looking back on it now, my experience in the 'cut and run' was captivating and very much instinctual because, of that early childhood training-- I received in CHASE '101.' --HA-HA-HA!!

From there, I finally run to a nearby friends house, which was like a few blocks away by the viaducts, without convincingly being seen. Now i'm on the side of my friend's house by the top of the viaducts and i see the cops about to drive past me. I find a nice round rock about the size of a baseball and sidearmed it at those slewfoots in the black and white. ALL THIS, WHILE I WAS DRUNK, AND I DIDN'T GET BEAT-UP OR SHOT.!!

© daniel miltz

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