On seizure
poem by:
Raychill Ellisonwonderland
Written
on Dec 10, 2015
How can I handle seeing this most precious body and soul tick with life, threatening hour every day. I don't have the answers to questions unasked my being craves them. Like seconds escaping from the hands of time, each one closer than the last, building on top, tick tock, controlled by the unknown before it strikes and the toll rises.
Tags: sad, confused,
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Christopher Russon commented:
Good poem
Hunter Meek
commented on Oct 06, 2017 at 4:00am
I love this! Especially
I don't have the answers to questions unasked
My being craves them
The ending is awesome, and when I say the ending I mean the whole third stanza and the very last line. I love the way It builds up. The start is interesting (I mean the very first stanza, the first two lines) and I like it. I would say the first line is too long but it actually gives quite a nice effect. I think I know what you mean in those first two lines. I think I know what you mean through this poem. And I like it. It speaks to me. 'Controlled by the unknown before it strikes and the toll rises.' I don't have anything negative to say!! You're a really good writer. If you want some constructive criticism, call up a poet better than I am, lol.
Raychill Ellisonwonderland
commented on Oct 11, 2017 at 9:49pm
Kia ora Hunter. I had to look up the meaning of stanza before I summed up the courage to reply. It’s/I'm weird...I post publically but then cringe when people comment haha. But your words help me through feeling embarrassed (as does C Russon and G Brewer). Thank you, thank you thank you.
