A SIMPLES NEW U.S. PRESIDENT

poem by: Darryl Ashton
Written on Jul 09, 2016

I'm running now for 
president of the good 
old U.S.A. 
I insult all the people - 
but they don't hear 
a word I say! 
The darlings in the  
White House, are 
all biting their finger 
nails, 
If I get elected I'll 
throw them all in  
the jails! 

I insult all the people 
who do get in my  
way, 
And then the refugees 
ask: 'please can we 
all stay?' 
I want to curb  
immigration that is a 
priority, 
But first I'll see my 
secretary - she can 
sit upon my knee! 

America will be born 
again - and be more 
positive, 
But every time I start 
to rant - I become a 
greasy spiv! 
The states are there 
for me - and they love 
my views, they do, 
But some good people 
out there - they want 
to run me through! 

I'll tell them lots of lies 
and sweet talk them 
to death, 
But will I get the top job? 
Please do not hold your 
breath! 
I have to meet some 
geezer who's dancing 
with some gran, 
Bopping to the boogie 
woogie - and showing 
off his tan! 

I'm on the election track 
for the White House job, 
But all that I really am 
is a vile "blonde" racist 
slob! 
I like to wave my arms 
about it makes me feel 
like the Duke, 
But when the people see 
me - they all do start to 
puke! 

I want to stop the asylum -  
it really is a joke, 
But what the hell is that 
burning smell - oh, my God,  
it is my coke!!!! 
I want to be an actor - like 
Rambo and his Expendables, 
But I really feel such a  
joke - I have to take some 
pills. 

Oh, mommy, please help  
me, I don't know what to  
say, 
Just do a Dirty Harry - and  
say; 'you'll make their day!' 
But, I am such a racist pig 
that is so clear to hear, 
But when my wig falls off -  
everyone does cheer!!!! 

Have you guessed the 
identity, of the new U.S  
president? 
Please, do not worry folks -  
it's just an experiment! 
The people will have their 
say - the vote is in their 
hands, 
Everyone is dancing - to 
the music of the bands. 

But were is Mr Wiggy - has 
he lost the vote? 
Who is in the White House -  
are you ready to take note! 
Donald Trump has been 
kicked out and has fled to 
Syria. 
Now at the White House -  
it's mass hysteria! 

America is celebrating -  
everyone is cheering. 
Who has got the top job -  
we'll now just keep you all 
guessing. 
But, what is going on? I 
see a puppet stand above. 
Everyone please welcome... 
Aleksandr Orlov!!!!!! 
Aleksandr now he waves, 
and he always feels okay. 
He welcomes the new  
immigration officer, his 
faithful friend called;  
'Sergei!'     

God Bless America - and 
all who live there to. 
The White House is all 
buzzing - this news is all 
brand new. 
But now a little furry lodger,  
asylum, he does beg. 
Who is this character...why 
its little baby Oleg! 
So welcome to the house 
of simples - and the new 
all American experiment, 
Meet Aleksandr Orlov -  
the new U.S. meerkat... 
President!!!! 


BY 
DARRYL ASHTON  

 

 

Tags: humor,

 

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